Celebration of Shawal in Singapore

Eid in Shawal

The celebration of Eid in Singapore during the month of Shawal is very colourful. For many Singaporeans of Baweanese descent, it is the time for visiting relatives and friends, exchanging information, catching up with each other or remembering the old good times. Like any other Singaporean Muslims, their homes are filled with colourful decorations and plenty of food for everyone. Traditional dishes and home-made cookies are always ready for the guests.
 

Eid-ul-Fitr 1990

 

Shawal is a joyous month of giving and receiving. The poor, the elderly and the little ones are always happy during this month, receiving green packets filled with cash. Smiles and laughter are always on their faces. It is always the same every year! Especially the children, they are the ones who lighten up the celebration of Eid through the years, decades after decades. Photographs of Eid capturing the moments of happiness show this is true!
 

Eid-ul-Fitr 1991

 

Eid-ul-Fitr 1992

Eid-ul-Fitr 1993

Eid-ul-Fitr 1994

Eid-ul-Fitr 1995

Eid-ul-Fitr 1996

Eid-ul-Fitr 1997

Eid-ul-Fitr 1998

Eid-ul-Fitr 1999

On The Last Day of Ramadhan

(Ramadhan at Makkah in the year 2000 - while at Jabal Uhud)

 

Today is 30th Ramadhan 1429 Hijrah, the last day of fasting. I recalled the year 2000 in which, during this time I spent Ramadhan in Makkah and celebrated Eid-ul-Fitr there. It was the most satisfying and memorable Ramadhan I ever celebrated in my entire life. I wished I could repeat that same kind of Ramadhan or better than that somewhere in the future, Insha'Allah. It seems to me time passes very fast that it is now almost ten years since I last spent my Ramadhan in the holy land of Makkah.
 

(Celebrating Eid-ul-Fitr in Mekkah - Umrah Ramadhan Trip 2000)

I felt that this year Ramadhan was too fast. I was unable to perform as much ibadah as I had planned. With my husband out-station most of the time, the mosque was beyond my reached. I was always busy attending my six year old son and there were only two of us on the dining table during Iftar, the breaking of fast. I even barely finish with the preparation for the Eid. There are still lots of work to be done at home. The sofa cover need to be changed, the clean curtains need to be hanged, the ingredients for tomorrow's early morning cooking need to be prepared tonight and most importantly the cooking for the last Iftar with my family, need to be done.

(Eid-ul-Fitr in Makkah - Dec 2000)

 

About thirty-five years ago, during my childhood, it was my late grandma, my mum and aunties who were the ones who used to be very busy preparing for Raya Day. While the adults were busy with the house-chores, my cousins, siblings and I were happily playing at the back lane behind our home, Pondok Kalompang Gubuk, until the last few minutes before Iftar. We were called in, minutes before the azan for sholat Maghrib (the sholat after sunset), one of the daily five prayers. By this time, the foods for Iftar were all ready laid on the dining table. The adults got to enjoy their meals at the dining table while the children picked their choice of foods on a plate and had their meals on the ''Ambin'' (a huge working table) in the kitchen.

 

(Map of South-East Asia... The Nusantara Region known as Malay Archipelago)

During this night, the azan was followed by ''Takbir'' denoting the dawn of Eid-ul-Fitr. After Iftar, it was time for sholat Maghrib and my granddad used to be the Imam. Moments after that, he would ''Takbir''. I used to be happy and excited to hear the ''Takbir'' because I was looking forward for tomorrow's morning break. To me it means no more hard work in the kitchen, helping my grandma with the pealing of potatoes skin and washing lots of ''loyang'', the mould for making ''kueh''.
 

Every Ramadhan during the 1960s and 1970s, my grandma used to rent a stall situated at the back lane just in front of the old Tekka Market. At this back lane, I used to help my mum selling ''kueh-kueh'', desserts prepared for breaking the fast. Among the ''kueh-kueh'' sold at my grandma's stall were Kueh Bakar, Kueh Putri Salat, Kueh Kosuee, Kueh Rangair and Agar-Agar.
 

(Kueh-Kueh... Desserts of the Nusantara Region)

Unlike my childhood days, as an adult I am always not as keen as before to meet the day on 1st Shawal. It is an obligation for every Muslims to celebrate Eid-ul-Fitr as well as Eid-ul-Adha in which, fasting is not allowed during these two Eids. However, I am always sad to leave Ramadhan and always supplicate for Almighty Allah to give me more chances in the future to celebrate Ramadhan again. May Almighty Allah give us the chance to meet Ramadhan again, in good health, in the years to come. Aameen.
 

To my Muslim readers all over the world, wishing all of you ''Eid Mubarak'' and to my husband, mother, sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, nephews, nieces, cousins, uncles, aunties, relatives and friends in Singapore and Malaysia, ''Selamat Hari Raya Aidil Fitri, Ma'af Zahir Batin''.

The Revelation Process of Al-Qur'an

The revelation process of the the Qur'an came in three stages. In the first stage, the whole content of the Qur’an was transferred, all at one time, to a place of ultimate custody of Almighty Allah called Al-Lauh Al-Mahfuz. The time of the transportation and the place it came from, only known to Allah, the Most High.

“Nay! This is a Glorious Qur’an, (inscribed) in Al-Lauh Al-Mahfuz.” [Translation of Surah Al-Buruj 85:21-22]

Then in the second stage, the entire content of the Qur’an was transferred down, all at one time, from Al-Lauh Al-Mahfuz to Baitul I’zzah (a place in the lowest heaven) during ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' which literally means, ''The Night of Decree''. According to many schools of philosophy, ''Night” means darkness, emptiness, hollowness as well as nothingness and upon the dawn of the day, a light makes everything crystal-clear. In a similar way, humanity was in total darkness and the revelation of the Qur’an had changed this darkness into light through its clear-cut guidance that made absolute distinctions between the right and the wrong.

Indeed, the Qur’an had changed many lives and the first person to have his life changed was a man named Muhammad ibn Abdullah. After the first revelation of the Qur'an on this earth, he embarked into a journey of Prophethood to perform the duty in conveying the message of the Qur’an, not only to his own people but also to the whole of humanity. During the last twenty-three years of his life as the Seal Prophet of Almighty Allah, the Qur’an was revealed to him, piece-by-piece. This is the third and final stage of the process whereby the Qur’an was revealed into this world, on this earth, to the human race in which the first revelation took place in the cave Hira. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) was taught to recite the first revealed surah, Surah Al-’Alaq (The Clot), by Angel Gabriel who came down to this world to carry out the duty of bringing down this first revelation on this earth.

''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' is a Grandeur Night, a night better and more worthy than a thousand months deserves to be found and the only way to be certain of finding it is to spend all the ten nights in sincere worship of Allah, the Most High. Through his traditions, Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him), the beloved Prophet of Islam, had shown Muslims the best way to utilize this great night.

Narrated Abu Hurairah (r.a.): The Prophet (s.a.w.) said, ''Whoever observed Sawn (fast) in the month of Ramadhan with sincere faith (i.e. belief) and hoping for a reward from Allah, than all his past sins will be forgiven, and whoever stood for the Salat (prayers) in the night of Qadr with sincere faith and hoping for a reward from Allah, then all his past sins will be forgiven.'' [Reported by Imam Bukhari, Sahih Al-Bukhari H 2014]

Narrated Aishah (r.a.): With the start the last ten days of Ramadhan, the Prophet (s.a.w.) used to tighten his waist belt (i.e. work hard) and used to keep awake all the night and perform Salat (prayer) and also used to keep his family awake for the Salat (prayer).'' [Reported by Imam Bukhari, Sahih Al-Bukhari H.2024]

Clearly ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' is a special gift from Almighty Allah to Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) and his followers. Hence, Muslims who did not celebrate Ramadhan to the fullest, particularly on the last ten nights, through constant performance of the daily sholat, proper fasting and performing other form of ibadah such as Sholat Taraweeh, Quran recitation, Dzikir, Qiyam-mul-lai, as well as giving Zakat and Charity, are among those who had given-up a valuable opportunity to perform good deeds -the savings for the life in the hereafter. These ibadah enable them to earn abundance of rewarding returns from Almighty Allah within thirty days i.e. in just a period of one month!

 

Indeed, ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' is the unique characteristic of the Ummah of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him). Although the followers of the earlier prophets had fasting prescribed for them, only the Ummah of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) is granted the supreme distinction of having this Grandeur Night during Ramadhan, the fasting month of the Muslim Calendar.

About the Night named ''Lailat-ul-Qadr''

(A copy of Written Al-Qur'an)

The night named ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' is a Majestic Night due to the revelation of the Qur'an. It was later on divinely sent to Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) throughout the last twenty-three years of his life as a Prophet. Verse 97:1-5 of Surah Al-Qadr and verse 44:1-4 of Surah Ad-Dukhan clearly stated that the Qur’an was revealed at night while verse 2:185 of Surah Al-Baqarah stated that the night was in the month of Ramadhan and that the Qur'an was sent as guidance not only for the Arabs, nor was it sent for the Muslims only, but rather for all mankind.

“Verily, We have sent it (this Qur’an) down in the Night of Al-Qadr (Decree). And what will make you know what the Night of Al-Qadr (Decree) is? The Night of Al-Qadr (Decree) is better than a thousand months. Therein descend the angels and the Ruh by Allah’s Permission with all Decrees. There is peace until the appearance of dawn.”
[Translation of Surah Al-Qadr 97:1-5]

“By the Qur’an that makes things clear. We sent this Qur’an down on a blessed night. Verily, we are ever warning (mankind). There (in that night) is cleared every matter of occurrences (like deaths, birth etc).”
[Translation of Surah Ad-Dukhan 44:1-4]

“…The month of Ramadhan in which was revealed the Qur’an, a guidance for people, and clear proofs of the guidance, and the Criterion (of right and wrong)….”
[Surah Al-Baqarah 2:185]

In verse 97:1-5 of Surah Al-Qadr, it is clearly stated that ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' is a night that is better than the nights of a thousand months. Interestingly, it should be noted that one thousand months is equal to eighty-three years and four months. Hence in another words, the worship during this night is better than the worship over eighty years of continuous submission to Almighty Allah i.e. the worship that took place during this night is better than a very large number of nights.

According to traditions, Ibn-Hatm narrated from Mujahid that Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) related to his companions the case of a person from the Israelites who continuously worshipped for eighty years without a break. Similarly, Ibn Jareer narrated from Mujahid that the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) said that a person from Israelites used to worship during the night and went for fighting in the path of Almighty Allah during the day. He did it for eighty years without a break.

Hence, the revelation in Surah Al-Qadr verse 97:1-5 that revealed the Night of Al-Qadr (Decree) is better than a thousand months, is sending a message to inform mankind that the worship during ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' is better than the eighty continuous years of worship performed by the particular person from Israelites mentioned above.

The Night of ''Tujoh Leko''

(Ramadhan at Bussorah Street)

My mother used to tell me that my sister, Nora, was born on ''Malam Tujoh Leko''. As I understand it, ''Malam'' is a Malay word for night and ''Tujoh'' is a Malay word for the number seven. However I honestly do not have the slightest idea of the meaning on the word ''Leko''. When I was a little girl, I did remember asking my mother the meaning of the phrase. She told me ''Malam Tujoh Leko'' describes the night before the dawn of the twenty-seventh day of Ramadhan. During that time, I did not understand my mother's explanation. As I grew up and learned about Islam, I gradually began to understand more about my religion.

According to Islam, the ''Azan'' (calling for prayers) for ''Sholat Maghrib'' (Maghrib prayers) at about 7.00 p.m. (Singapore time) denotes the beginning of a new day. Hence, on the night of the date 26th Ramadhan is the beginning of the twenty-seventh day of the fasting month. Yesterday night was the night of ''Tujoh Leko''. Recalling the time I used to live in Pondok Kalompang Gubuk, during this night, the phrase ''Malam Tujoh Leko'' was almost on the lips of everyone living in the same pondok with my family. It seems to me that they regarded this night to be very special because they were extremely excited doing strange things that I could not comprehend at that time. I found their behaviours to be very peculiar during this night. They used to stay up late as if it was a night meant not for sleeping.

When I reached my adulthood, after completing a formal education in Islamic studies, only then I realized that the night of ''Tujoh Leko'' was actually associated with the night known as ''Lailat-ul-Qadr''. Upon the dawn of this realization, the question that always lingers in my mind was answered. I concluded the reason behind the expression seen on my Mum's face beaming with smile of happiness, every time she mentioned about the night my sister was born, was all this while due to the thought that she had gave birth to a daughter on ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'', a special night bestowed to the Ummah of Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) by Almighty Allah.

However, no one knows the exact night of Lailat-ul-Qadr. Not even Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him). Some say it is the twenty-seventh of the month and others say it varies from year to year, but always among the last ten days of Ramadhan. What is clear is that it falls on one of the nights during the last ten days of the fasting month. In a Hadith narrated by Aishah (r.a.), Imam Bukhari reported that Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) said; ''Search for the night of Qadr in the odd nights of the last ten nights of Ramadhan.''. Hence, it can be concluded that ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' is once in a year, every year, in one of the nights during the last ten days in the month of Ramadhan.

So, what is ''Lailat-ul-Qadr'' all about? Why is it so special that the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) had instructed his Ummah to seek for it. The whole episode on the greatness of this one night which has been described with several descriptions such as ''The Night of Power'', ''The Night of Destiny'', ''The Night of Decree'', ''The Night of Grandeur'', ''The Night of Majesty'' and ''Honourable Night'', interest me a lot. It was even intoxicating to me, when the lecturer who once taught me on the subject Qur’an and Hadith during my course of study, said to the class that, “Lailat-ul-Qadr'', the Night of Power, is better than the nights in a thousand months. At that moment, my thoughts were demanding for logical explanations to the queries in my mind about this night that was projected to be very powerful.

During that period of time, I simply could not comprehend the greatness of this one night to be better than all the other nights. How was it be possible for a single night to be better than the nights of a thousand months? What is so special about ''Lailat-ul-Qadr''? What made that night superior than every other night in a thousand months? My questions were answered as I listened attentively to my lecturer as he explained to the class about what happened on that one night, the night that was named ''Lailat-ul-Qadr''. At the end of the lecture, everything became crystal clear to me and I finally fully understood the significance of this Majestic Night!

Marriage in Islam

Generally, many people do not realize that marriage is a binding contract between two individual of different gender that binds all the actions committed by the couple throughout the life span of the marriage contract itself. In Islam, marriage is a scared matrimonial life contract between a man and a woman to live together as husband and wife with blessing from Almighty Allah.

Like any other contracts, a marriage contract is an agreement between two parties having common objectives aiming to achieve one common goal. It is automatically terminated upon the death of one party. In addition to this, in an Islamic matrimony, the marriage can be terminated through divorce. However this is not preferred unless it is unavoidable. Divorce is labelled as ''the most hated of permitted things'' in Islam.

Islam encourages adult Muslims to develop a good family structure through a system concerning marriage laid out under the Islamic Family Institutions prescribed by Shari'ah. It forbids marital relationships without wedlock because it can produce abundance of illegitimate children which is a very disturbing issue. Islam also condones but discourages Muslims to be married followed by divorce many times. Muslim men are encouraged to marry needy women and have large families. They are allowed to marry legally a maximum of four wives at one time under acceptable circumstances. Polygamous marriage in Islam is strictly controlled and governed by the Shari'ah Law.

''Marry women of your choice, two or three or four, but if you fear that you shall not be able to deal justly with them then only one or one that your right hands possess. That will be more suitable, to prevent you from doing injustice.'' (Translation of Surah An-Nisa verse 4:3)''You will never be able to deal justly between wives however much you desire (to do so). But (if you have more than one wife) do not turn altogether away (from one), leaving her in suspense…'' (Translation of Surah An-Nisa verse 4:129)

The Quranic verse 4:3 discourages but allows a man to marry more than one wife if he could deal justly with them while verse 4:129 highlighted that a man is unable to deal justly between wives which Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) himself, the greatest Prophet of all, unable to qualify as one, without Allah's help and guidance. No mere man of reasonable intelligence could handle such situation as what the Prophet (peace and blessing be upon him) had gone through. Since generally, no mere human beings can fulfil this Qur'anic requirement hence, no Muslim should really have more than one wife.

All in all, marriage in Islam constitutes all the good things such as healthy relationship, responsibility, commitment, good health, good deeds, happiness and abundance of wealth, i.e. legitimate children. Its primary objective is to preserve and continue the human race while at the same time provide protection of morals. Hence, marriage in Islam encompasses the developing of good family structure to continue respectable generations in the future. It is of no doubt that marriage relationship is good morality and happiness, creating a just and cohesive society where the needs of men and women are well taken care off. Thus, all adult Muslims are encouraged to get married in order to avoid pre-marital sexual affairs. Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him) had directed Muslims to get married otherwise, they are to observe patience until they get married.

Narrated 'Abdullah bin Mas'ud (r.a.): Allah's Messenger (s.a.w.) said to us, ''O young men, those of you who can support a wife should marry, for it (marriage) controls the gaze and preserves one for immorality; but those who cannot should fast, for it is a means of suppressing the sexual desire.'' [(Agreed upon) – Bulugh Al-Maram compiled by Al-Hafiz Ibn Hajar Al-Asqalani]

The Islamic Matrimonial Ceremony

(The Bridegroom signing the Marriage Certificate)

In Islam, for a marriage to be legal, it takes more than signing of the matrimonial contract paper, i.e. the Marriage Certificate. In an Islamic Matrimony Ceremony, first of all the bride will be asked on her standings towards the marriage by the appointed officer-in-charge from the Shari'ah Majistrate State Office known as the Qadhi. He is the person who has been given the authority by the State Shari'ah Majistrate to be the Hakim (Judge) of Matrimonial Ceremony. If the bride agreed on the marriage to be carried out, only then the solemnization would be exercised.

(The Aqad Nikah between the Qadhi and the Bridegroom. Notice the ''Ijab'' is taking place whereby the Qadhi is making his speech to the Bridegroom)

 

The Islamic solemnization is known as ''Aqad Nikah''. Literally ''Aqad'' means Knot and ''Nikah'' means Marry. There are five elements for an Aqad Nikah to take place. First is ''Sheega''. Second, there must be two male witnesses who are free men (not slaves) and true Muslims (not Faasiq). Third, there must be a ''Wali''. Fourth, there must be a bridegroom. Fifth, there must be a bride. For any reasons that the solemnization is being carried out without any one of these elements, the marriage is classified as null and void.
 

(Notice the ''Kabul'' is taking place whereby the Bridegroom is accepting the marriage witness by the two witnesses sitting beside the Qadhi and the Wali)

 

''Sheega'' is the act of solemnization. It constitutes of ''Ijab Kabul''. ''Ijab'' means the clarification from the bride that she is willing to accept the bridegroom as her husband in marriage. ''Kabul'' means the clarification from the bridegroom that he is willing to accept the bride as his lawful wife. The act of ''Ijab Kabul'' has to be carried out between the ''Wali'' and the Bridegroom.
 

(In this Matrimonial Ceremony, the Wali is a ten year old boy who is the brother of the bride. In the photography he is seen sitting between one of the witness and the Qadhi)

Generally, a ''Wali'' is the representative of the bride who is her legal guardian related by lineage and is responsible for her welfare and well being. In normal circumstances he is the father of the bride. Otherwise, in cases whereby the bride's father is not available (due to death or missing) then her brother or any other legal paternal relatives such as grandfather, nephew (brother's son), uncle, cousin (whose father is the brother of the bride's father), grand-uncle (paternal uncle of bride's father), and so on, can be the bride's Wali.
 

(In this photograph, the Wali is seen taking the Aqad of giving the authority to the Qadhi in undertaking the responsiblity of the Wali on his behalf for his sister in the marriage.)

 

In the act of ''Ijab Kabul'' the Wali and the bridegroom has to hold hand (in a shaking-hand position). Upon doing this, hence the ''Aqad'' took place. Then immediately the Wali has to make his speech loud and clear directed to the bridegroom. As soon as he finishes with his speech, he has to shake his hand and the bridegroom has to immediately continue from there by saying out loud and clear that he accepted the marriage with thereby the said dowry.

A speech generally spoken by a Wali who is the father of the bride

''(Saying the name of the bridegroom), I am giving you my daughter, (mentioning the name of the bride), in this marriage by the commandment of Almighty Allah in order for you to take good care of her as your wife and if for any reason should you divorce her, it should be done in good faith. (Saying the name of the bridegroom), I am giving you my daughter, (mentioning the name of the bride), in this marriage with the dowry of (stating the dowry and its amount). ''

[Translated in English -from ''Panduan Ilmu Fiq'h Syeikh Omar Al-Khatib, Bab Munakahat'' ]
 

(A form of dowry. In this Matrimony, it is a gold chain)

 

As soon as the ''Ijab Kabul'' is completed, the Qadhi will ask the two witnesses on the validity of the act of solemnization. After hearing the validity of the matrimony from the two witnesses, the Qadhi give the drafted oath prepared by the Shari'ah Magistrate State Office to the bridegroom for him to take his oath in front of those who are present during the solemnization. It is included in the oath that the bridegroom promise to perform his duty as a husband and head of his family.

 

After the completion of the oath taking by the bridegroom, the Qadhi then issue the Marriage Certificate to be signed by the newly wed couple as well as the Wali. The Matrimonial Ceremony usually ends with supplications made together, headed by the Qadhi followed by the others, similar to that at the beginning of the ceremony. Normally a Wedding feast will then be held afterwards or on the following day.

 

Narrated Anas hin Malik (r.a.): The Prophet (s.a.w.) saw the trace of yellow colour on 'Abdur Rahman bin 'Auf (r.a.) and asked, ''What is this?'' He replied, ''O Messenger of allah, I have married a woman for a Nawat weight (equal to the weight of a date-stone) of gold.'' He said, ''May Allah bless you! Hold a wedding feast, even if with a goat (only).'' [(Agreed upon) - ''Bulugh Al-Maram'' complied by Al-Hafiz Ibn Hajar Al-Asqalani)

Reference

• M.Salleh Bin A.Hamid (2002). ''Panduan Ilmu Fiq'h Syeikh Omar Al-Khatib-Bab Munakahat''. SAH Publication, Sinngapore.
• Muhammad Bin Ismail Al-Sanani (1996). ''Bulugh Al-Maram complied by Al-Hafiz Ibn Hajar Al-Asqalani''. Dar-us-Salam Publications, Saudi Arabia.

The Baweanese and Marriage in Islam

(Aqad Nikah)

''Kabhein pokol. Tak kabhein pokol.'' was the phrase concerning marriage that I used to hear during the time I was living in Pondok Kelompang Gubuk. Literally, it means ''Got beaten in marriage. Got beaten in avoiding marriage.'' It was often spoken in the past by the Singaporean Baweanese in cases whereby a marriage was done hurriedly due to illicit acts done by the concern couple who was in love.

During the era of Pondok life, whenever a couple was caught dating, the guy was made responsible for the action. He was strongly demanded by the parents of the lady to marry their daughter. The couple was required to be married to each other without having the chance of defending themselves on their standings towards the marriage. This culture was one of the Baweanese ways in handling their young on pre-marital issues in the attempt to avoid fornication among these youngsters. Such practice was influenced by Islam through its teaching concerning the matter on marriage.

In Islam pre-marital activities conducted by unmarried couple are not permissible. Hence, according to the understanding of the Baweanese on this matter, young couples that were caught red-handed while going out together especially to watch movies and holding hands while walking, had shown the desire to conduct pre-marital activities that could lead to fornication hence, in this sense, the couple were better off to be married to each other as soon as possible.

Being Muslims, the Baweanese conducted their marriages in accordance with the Shari'ah Law. According to Islam, once a girl starts to menstruate, she has reached the age of puberty and considered as a young adult. Similarly, once a boy starts to experience the 'wet dream', it is a sign that he has attained adulthood. Thus, such girl and boy had attained the legal age to get married. In order to protect their young from committing fornication, the Baweanese used to practice the culture of marrying their wards at a very young age, i.e. as soon as they reached the age of puberty.

Before the 1950s, the Singaporean Baweanese used to marry-off their daughters as young as eight years old. My paternal aunt is a living proof! She was only eight years old during the time she was married-off towards the late 1940s, to her husband who was then about three times her senior. My grandmothers and grand-aunties were all among those who married at a very young age since they menstruated at the age between ten and twelve.

It was the culture of the past Baweanese descents living in Singapore to arrange their daughters for marriage once these girls attained the age of puberty. Generally these young adults would be married off to a suitor whom the parents had in their opinion that he had the ability to support and take care of their daughters' welfare and well-being. The potential candidates were normally those in their twenties, holding stable jobs.

Especially during the Japanese Occupation (15th February 1942 to 15th August 1945), such practice was common not only among the Baweanese but among Muslims in different community too. According to my maternal grandma, at that period it was a necessity to the Bawean people and other Muslims living in Singapore as well as those living in the Malay Peninsula to get their young daughters to be married in order to protect them from being taken away by the Japanese troops. During that time, girls as young as ten were snatched away from their parents to fill up the brothels set-up for the purpose of ''entertaining'' the Japanese soldiers to satisfy their sexual needs.

While the culture of ''Kabhein pokol. Tak kabhein pokol'' has long gone together with the Baweanese culture of living in Pondok, the culture of marriage among young adults is generally no longer in practice by the Singaporean Baweanese of today generations. This is due to the changing mind-set of the Bawean people and their life-style living in the era of 21st century Singapore. Moreover marriages among young adults are discouraged by the Singapore Shari'ah Court.

Baweanese Wedding in Singapore

The Baweanese wedding in Singapore is generally similar to those of other ethnic groups originated from Indonesia such as Bugis, Javanese, Banjarees and others that live in the Singapore Malay Community. The similarity is due to the fact that they shared the same religion, Islam, and their ancestors previously came from the region of Nusantara i.e. the Malay Archipelago.

 

In the past, the differences in wedding ceremony of these ethnic groups were apparent. For example, the ceremony of ''Khatam Qur'an'' was one among the prominent features in a Baweanese wedding celebration. During this ceremony the bride reads the Qur'an, on the ''Pelamin'' for visitors to witness her ability in reciting the Qur'an eloquently. This ceremony is usually followed by ''Marhaban'', the Islamic hymns praising Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessing be upon him), performed by either an all male group or an all female group.

 

(A ''Pelamin'' is a decorated stage platform )

 

Through the years, like any other ethnic groups in Singapore Malay Community, the wedding celebration among Baweanese encountered changes as the wedding trends in this community evolves. Slowly, ceremonies such as ''Khatam Qur'an'' and the shared ceremony of the elaborate ''Malam Berinai'' diminishes with time. Today, even the service of Marhaban and Hadrah groups are rarely being used. With the assimilation of wedding cultures due to mix marriages between ethnic groups in the Malay community living in Singapore, the similarities are very close. Differences can only be seen through careful observation on the behaviours, speeches and the way in which the hosts of the wedding celebration present themselves during the occasion, particularly in relations to their clothing and ornaments they wear.

 

(The bridegroom and his bride sitting side-by-side on a "Pelamin'' - 10th August 2008)

 

Today, most Baweanese in Singapore share the same wedding cultures with other ethnic groups in the Malay Community. In most cases, it is a big wedding celebration but with simple ceremonies on the wedding day. Guests are invited for a buffet reception throughout the day and simultaneously, to witness the ''Bersanding'' ceremony in which, the bridegroom and his bride, sit side-by-side similar to that of a King and Queen on a throne. Indeed they are the "King and Queen'' throughout the day on their wedding day! In todays context, the ''Bersanding'' ceremony is a time for photo session with relatives and friends. It is the time of opportunity for these guests to congratulate the newly wed couple with lots of blessings.

 

(Present day ''Bersanding'' Ceremony on 9th August 2008)

 

Gone were the days whereby a wedding occasion took few days to hold several ceremonies. Among the many ceremonies that were once considered important was the ''Malam Berinai''. In todays context, it is a private photo taking session. Normally, a day before the wedding celebration after going through the ''Aqad Nikah'' session, the bridegroom and his bride became ''models'', wearing different kind of traditional costumes with heavy make-up on their faces and the dye from the ''Inai'' (Hiina) gives the dark reddish-orange colour on their fingers.

 

(''Bersanding'' Ceremony during 1980s)

 

(''Bersanding'' Ceremony during 1970s)

 

The ''Aqad Nikah'' ceremony is usually held among close relatives either at the bride's parental home or at the Shari'ah Magistrate Office. This is a solemnization ceremony that validates the marriage between the bridegroom and his bride to be official. Moments before the ''Aqad Nikah'' begins, the bride will be asked by the ''Qadhi'', the Marriage Officer appointed by the Muslims' Magistrate Office, on her marital status and her standings that the marriage is of her freewill.

 

(The signing of Marriage Certificate during Solemnization Ceremony)
 

In the era of 1950s and 1960s, one of the prominent features in a Baweanese wedding celebration in Singapore was the appearance of two little girls serving as bridesmaids. During the ''Bersanding'' ceremony, they could be seen standing beside the bridegroom and his bride with fans on their hands, keeping the newly wed couple cool and comfortable. Such features disappeared slowly as time goes-by.

(The ''Bersanding'' Ceremony during 1950s)

  (The ''Bersanding'' Ceremony during 1960s - Notice the two little bridesmaids standing beside the bridegroom and bride.)

 

Also during this period, the presence of' ''Hadrah'' was important. The Hadrah is a group of people beating the ''Kompang'' while accompanying the bridegroom to the bride's home for the ''Bersanding'' ceremony. Today, in most weddings the beats of ''Kompang'' can only be heard through audio.

 

(A Singaporean Baweanese Hadrah group during 1960s)

 

(The Hadrah group accompanying the bridegroom to the bride's parental home)

 

(A ''Kompang'' is a kind of drum)

 

Another prominent feature is the carrying of ''Bunga Manggar'' during the ceremony of ''Bertandang''. This is a pole in which at one end, a pineapple fruit is being used to hold a bunch of decorative colourful coconuts leaf veins, taking the shape of an umbrella-like shade. ''Bertandang'' is a ceremony in which the bridegroom and his bride visit the venue of the wedding celebration at both sides.

 

(Notice the man holding the ''Bunga Mangar" as he accompanies the bridgrooms going to the bride's home)

The ''Pelamin'', ''Bersanding'', ''Bunga Manggar'', ''Bertandang'', ''Hadrah'' and ''Kompang'' are among the shared cultures of wedding celebrations in the Singapore Malay Community. Below are videos showing a glimpse of a Baweanese Wedding in Singapore.

 

 

(Present day of ''Bertandang'' in which the bridegroom bring his bride over to the venue of the wedding ceremony held at his side - Notice the ''Bunga Manggar'' carried by the two males accompanying the newly wed couple)

(Upon request from his mum, the Bridegroom is entertaining his guests, singing in a Karaoke session. Nowadays, most wedding celebration in the Singapore Malay Community, Karaoke is a popular choice of entertainment for the guests.)

 

This post is dedicated to my dear cousin, Mohammad Zahril. May your marriage brings lots of joy and everlasting happiness in your life. Aameen.

Kampong Amber

(My extended families living in Kampong Amber since 1950s)

Kampong Amber was once situated at Amber Road, in Katong area. There were several Singaporean Baweanese families living side-by-side with the Malays in this kampong. Among the Singaporean Baweanese who previously lived there were my paternal grandma and aunties. When Grandma Asmaniah remarried, she moved out from Pondok Kalompang Gubuk to live with her husband in Kampong Amber, while my dad lived with his sister, Aunt Jamaliah, in the same kampong. Later on when my dad married my mum, he moved back to Pondok Kalompang Gubuk, living there for the next fourteen years before moving out of the Pondok to live in HDB flat.

(Singaporean Baweanese Wedding at Kampong Amber in early 1960s)

 

Even though I lived in Pondok Kalompang Gubuk for the first twelve years of my life, I often stayed over at my Aunt Jamaliah's home, spending the whole school holidays in Kampong Amber. The memory of kampong life always lingers in my mind recalling the period of joy, having lots of fun with my cousins and kampong friends, playing in the open within the compound of Kampong Amber. We played all sort of kampong games from catching spider to playing hide-and-seek to hop-scotch to skipping ropes and racing games.

 

(My parents visiting their relatives in Kampong Amber during mid-1960s)

I could still recall the morning sound of dawn; the crowing of the cocks and the chirping of the birds on the trees, acting like the alarm clock, waking everybody up. The water from the well was icy cold in the early morning and was very useful in waking-up those sleepy heads. I really miss the kampong life atmosphere! Those were the days and the good times of my childhood, the wonderful period of my life. During those days, I was extremely happy and felt fortunate to have beautiful family and wonderful extended families, the people whom I loved, living happily all around me.
 

(I was in my dad' arms while he was standing beside his step-mother.... his step-father remarried not long after Grandma Asmaniah passed away....during mid-1960s)

 

Indeed my dad had given me a splendid childhood life, the period in which never in a million years could I ever imagine that somewhere in my life ahead that I would be in a state of misery, especially during the depressing period of seeing my youngest sister and only brother to experience sadness in their childhood life. They did not have the same beautiful childhood memory as mine. The childhood life of my two youngest siblings was the most difficult period of my life.

 

(Present day Amber Road)

 

(Along this stretch of road there are several blocks of condominiums)

 

(Look!!! a palm tree from the past Kampong Amber is still standing tall at the same spot!

 .... I'm just joking! :D )

 

(This condominium is indeed very high!)